Real grown-up

DR: "Wait, you're a real grown-up? Like not in college anymore? I thought you were still in college."

Slice of cheese

MFM: "What are we doing today?"
Me: "We're going to the corn maze!"
MFM: "Do you think there will be a slice of cheese at the end?"

Are you sorry about punching and kicking the windows? Or unbuckling in heavy traffic? Or getting mud everywhere, including the ceiling? I just want to be clear what you're sorry about...

DR: "I'm sorry I kicked your car."

Just what I needed :)

MFM: "I wish you could pick me up aftah school evuh-wee day!"

Dark guys

10 year old AC: "I really dig dark guys."

This was a good pairing :)

Motorcycle chick

DR: "Who's in front of us?"
Me: "Danni."
DR: "That's Danni's car?!"
Me: "Yep."
DR: "I thought she had a motorcycle!"
Me: "You thought she was going to pick up your sister on her motorcycle?!"

Phish

BS: "Would it be a conflict of interest to meet up with you at the Phish concert?"
Me: "Probably but I'll ask my supervisor."

(Translation: Yes, yes it is a conflict of interest and no I will not be meeting up with you at the Phish concert.)

Mommy?!

AC: "I want that dollhouse Mommy!"
Me: ...uncomfortable silence....

Born see-through

KC: "Hey G, your lips are purple."
GB: "My lips are purple because I was born see-through!"