Racist

JL: "I'm not racist but... I don't like black people."
Me: "Well J, that is what being racist is."

To the bar

DM: "Can we go to Franny-O's?"

Good beats

EC: "That car has some good beats."

Hate

CR: "I fucking hate you!"

Dirty

*To a 14 year old girl*

Me: "Don't touch that pigeon!!"

Thank you

BM: "Thank you so much, I'm having so much fun!"

Herb

*Seeing a box of garlic and herb rice*

DM: "Isn't herb like a drug? You know, like... like heroin?"

Poop

DM: "I might have to fart. But it might be a poop."
Me: "Do you need to go to the bathroom?"
DM: "No, I'll just hold it."
Me: "It's not good to hold it D."
DM: "It's ok!"

*5 minutes later*

DM: "Yep, I have to poop! I'll be back in twenty minutes."

Old century

CR: "You're from the old century. Like before Ipods and cell phones and computers."

Bring it

CP (to me): "You wanna go, little girl?"

SMD

JL: "SUCK MY DICK!"

Scissoring

*While playing 500*

CP: "I'm gonna scissor you!!!!"

FLB

C: "You're a fucking lesbian BITCH!"

Women drivers

*Playing the game of Life*

(After landing on the 4th car accident square on the board)

Me: "Wow! I have been in a lot of accidents!"
KB: "Ugh! Women drivers!"

Birthday present

Me: "Happy day after your birthday! I can't believe you're 9 now!"
MFM: "Yeah, well, I wish you could get me a birthday present."

Mocha

AC: "You know how I'm half black?"
Me: "Yes."
AC: "I'm mocha!"

Ready, set, go

MFM: "Why can't you pick me up earlier?"
Me: "Because I am running the Girls on the Run group. I'm the head coach."
MFM: "So you say 'Ready, set, go!'?"

Halfrican

CS: "Are you half bwack?"

Dirty car

RK: "Can we get your car washed?"

Vitamin water

*Watching city bus with Vitamin water ad drive by*

RK: "Is that bus going to the Vitamin water store?"
Me: "That would make sense."